Friday, November 16, 2012
the truth about . . . Men, Access & Azz
Now lets remove the creepy factor and think about what this instant access is creating for someone like the "average Joe" . He's educated or has a skilled trade which brings him a decent wage. He has pics of himself as a child on his profile page (awwwww). He usually has a funny or sometimes introspective status update. He never has pics with women that would jeopardize his image of appearing "available". This prohibits skepticism and the following inbox message "She's cute. Is that your girlfriend?". His relationship status is not visible and is never updated. He appears (via screen) to be a really nice guy. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS REALLY MEANS? Ass-quakes. Ass-trays. Ass-states. Ass-shakes. It's a plethora of a**and all he has to do is log in. When he's bored. During halftime. Waiting to be interviewed. When his date goes to the restroom. Waiting on the movie to begin. At work. When he can't sleep.
Odds are there is a woman available to converse via inbox at any one of those times. It's simple math and time zone calculation (the net is worldwide baby). And those conversations are a plan. No matter how long it takes. It's a systematic pecking order and a steady drip eventually creates a hole. Even if he never beds you, the fact that you converse with him boost his ego. When you fall out of place he can go days without communicating with you because there is always someone else. And when you reconnect its just like time never passed you by. Know why? Because the previous conversations are right there for you to peruse and they rekindle (over and over again) that euphoric bliss without him even saying anything additional. By this time you gon'. Not gone. GON'.
Once these conversations manifest into meeting for coffee or "just hanging out" half the work is done. You like him. This actually cuts down on the time it takes to get you in bed. Instantly this dude is gettin' it in with women he would have never had a shot with. Sounds like paradise for a man - its not. It's actually the most dangerous combination known to man. Access + Opportunity + Yearning + Willing participants = Internal powder keg.
So in good conscious I cant sit back and allow your insatiable appetite to destroy your soul. I get it. Sex to you is so good it's not even describable (read the "4F's - Feed him, *uck Him, be Faithful & stFu sometimes"). But you have to know and understand that for every woman you run through you are losing a piece of yourself, destroying a piece of her and relinquishing any hope of ever loving a woman unconditionally. You can front for others in the club. In the office. At the game; but don't front on yourself. Stop believing "these hoes are all the same" and giving into the one part of yourself that can eradicate any hope of something sensible.
Whenever you decide to allow yourself to love and be loved - what will you have left? You'll end up a shell of a person. All because of some AZZ. Your larger than life ego has convinced you that you should satisfy every urge and fantasy because now you can. Here's your chance to shine. To be that dude you once envied. To not have one dime but a few. All that glitters is not gold and every sugary thing is not sweet. At the end of the day you're a grown man. You'll do as you please. In the course of doing what you please be mindful of that empty feeling that creeps up on you every so often. Every so often is going to turn into every day. And that 30 minute session (I'm being generous) with the chic you don't even like will not be enough to fill that void that you willingly created.