Monday, November 19, 2012
the truth about . . . You're not thick your FAT (part II)
Not too long ago I wrote a piece on weight. It was a kind way of saying, "hey, things are getting out of control with how much America is beginning to weigh." To be fair and authentic, any topic I write about is being written from a personal perspective. I know what it's like to be overweight. Having been a resident of "umpuh-lumpuhville" myself (weighing 225lbs), I get it. Which is why it's difficult for me to have compassion for people who refuse to acknowledge what's happening to their bodies or work to improve them.
It's extremely difficult for me to understand this new era of "fat". This overconfident, brash, pushy, presumptuous, over-bearing woman that is in denial about two things. 1.) her health. 2.) the way she looks. Let me set the record straight so that men aren't left to do the heavy lifting (pun intended). There is nothing remotely sexy or appealing about a woman that is obese or morbidly obese. N O T H I N G!!! And just because the porn industry has a BBW category doesn't make it acceptable. There is also a difference between dressing like a lady or a whore no matter your size. Today I'm addressing the whores (or as most rap songs say "these ho's).
You may be kind. You may be talented. You may be smart. You may be educated. You may be pretty. Those qualities alone are enough to radiate sexiness. But NOOOOO. You'd rather prance around in a dress that was originated for a size 0, 2 or 4 and you're a size 24. Do you not know what you look like? In short, please stop disrespecting yourself. If you can't do that at least respect the fact that many of us don't wanna see you - NAKED. I know what some of you are thinking, don't look then. Sorry, we are innocent onlookers; mesmerized like a deer in the headlights. Which is why we can't stop looking.
Is everyone woman going to be a size 0, 2, or 4? No. Should every woman be a size 0, 2 or 4? No. But every woman should know the truth. Parading yourself around half naked looking like a rump roast before the strings are removed or a can of busted biscuits just to prove you're some how competitive with the skinny chics is sad. It does nothing but reinforce the stereotype that you will do anything and everything for the attention you are craving. You have a group of friends who all look just like you and instead of saying "Damn, this is not a good look. We are out of breath; we have high blood pressure and we are predisposed to diabetes based on family history. We are using the electronic cart at the grocery store because we can't walk for 30 minutes. We gotta get this ish under control. We don't have to look like toothpicks but we gotta do something. Let's support each other and get it done."
That is clearly not the conversation. The convo goes something like this "Girl bye! I'm HOTT just like the rest of these broads. My hair is fly (which I refuse to sweat out by the way), I can dress and I got a cute face".
What you've done is surrounded yourself with a group of peers that affirm your mess. Instead of you taking the "Bitter Heffa Association" to the next level you'd rather slap high fives with them so you can stay in your comfort zone. You'd rather be tolerable than chased. The average man will say "yeah, I'd hit" (at least for right now). And I've conversed with plenty of men that have shared with me how they really feel.
"If I'm with a woman and I love her and she begins to gain weight I'm not going to leave her but things may change if I'm not attracted to her sexually any more."
"If I treated my wife/significant other a certain way when we first met (flowers, candy, shopping, trips, etc.) and I stopped, wouldn't she be upset? Now if she gains weight, like a lot of weight, I'm not suppose to be upset? That's not how we began our relationship".
"The side walk is free. That and a jump rope is all you need . Plus she buys them damn Tyler Perry movies on bootleg; get that Insanity or something too; but by all means do something to show me you care about yourself."
Men have a legitimate gripe (and yes so do women). There are plenty of men suffering from "Dickdo". That's an ailment that forces your stomach to stick out further than yo' *ick do. I'll be addressing the men soon - don't worry. This is certainly not about men though. Simply put its reality. I'm sick of women trying to make "fat" pretty and acceptable. It is not. It's not acceptable to treat your body any kind of way. It's not acceptable to eat yourself into a congestive heart failure status. It is not acceptable to use the excuse of "eating healthy cost too much". It's not acceptable to say "this is how we eat as a community".
As much as people like to yell "YOLO" it is amazing to me that those idiots are forgetting it is "self awareness" that is the biggest determining factor in how long that actually is. We (ladies) have got to do better.
Q: Since you have so much to say about being fat how much do you weigh now? Did you have surgery? How did you lose the weight? I'm just curious. Do you have any pics?
A: Thank you for your question. I'm glad you were able to read the article subjectively. I currently weigh 147lbs. I didn't have ANY type of surgery (gastric bypass, lipo or tummy tuck) or use ANY food program (Jenny Craing, Weight Watchers, etc) . I lost the weight by hitting the gym 5-6 days a week. I also became a certified fitness instructor which helps me to stay active. The chic in the black bikini - that's me May 2012!! YOLO!!!!!!!