Monday, October 1, 2012
the truth about . . . being marriage material
A FaceBook friend posed the question "what makes you wife material?" After much consideration I was able to articulate the reasons why I know I am marriage material.
Dear Future Husband,
I am wife material because I've looked myself in the mirror and asked the difficult questions. I've asked God to reveal the good, the bad and the ugly regarding "me". I’ve allowed my spirit ear to accept God’s assessment of me and I’m working on resolving those issues.
I'm wife material because I've unpacked the baggage that could have weighed down our marriage.
I'm wife material because I NO LONGER have unrealistic expectations regarding what OUR marriage is suppose to be. It will be as unique as we are and we will make our rules according to "us" and use God's laws as a guide.
I am wife material because I will not allow outside influences to bend my ear and dictate how I should address any problems we will face.
I am wife material because I understand and will accept that I am no longer a single woman therefore I do not act as if I am. I don’t go to the places that I used to and I don’t spend the same amount of time with my single friends.
I am wife material because not only is my body a temple but it is also yours. That’s why I keep it in the gym 4-5x's a week.
I am wife material because I've come to understand that there is a very delicate process that comes with holding a man's heart. Its not that men don’t want to commit, it’s the fear of committing to the wrong one.
I am wife material because I am not the "wrong one".
I am wife material because God is my compass and my guide and if I can’t hear God then my mother that was married to my father for 32 years is second in line for advice. If Mom is busy then I'll reflect on the memories of my Grandmother who stayed the course with my Grandfather after he was paralyzed from the waste down. Leaving her to bare most of responsibility of raising 8 children plus me from a teenage mother. If those memories become too distant I'll call my Dad's Mom who was married to my Grandfather for 47 years. If all else fails and I'm at my wits ends I'll simply look to you and say "baby I need you to lead me".
I'm wife material because I want your love and above all else I want to give you a reason to believe that real women who love God still exist and through it all I'll love you unconditionally no matter what. You were designed for me by God. A gift like no other and I would never take you, your love and God's gift for granted.
I never signed the "I'm a strong, single, educated, independent sistah" petition and I really want a life that includes having a fulfilling marriage.